Why compete?

Here I am not talking about the kind of competition we see in sports or any other form of healthy competition. I am emphasizing the competitiveness that we see in our day to day lives.

Competing is a way one's ego asserts itself. It's a dance done by the ego for its’ own entertainment. A competitive person is usually never confident of oneself and he constantly needs to feel superior to others. Mostly such people are mentally restless and have constant seeking and hungry look in their eyes. Even when such as a person succeeds at something he is always unsure and never really savors his success for he is too afraid that someone else might be a bigger success than him.

Competition is harmful not only because it strengthens the ego but also because it makes one too interested in defeating others rather than allowing his own creativity to flower. When one is competitive, he becomes insecure, when one is insecure he becomes fearful, fear leads to suspicion, suspicion leads to subterfuge. The victim rather than concentrating fully in developing and using his own talents, wastes a significant part of his energy in trying to belittle and outdo others' achievements. As a result a significant amount of his potential goes to waste.

It is ugly to see ambitious parents inculcating sense of competitiveness in their children. I call it ugly, because it conditions the child's mind from a very tender age in becoming self seeking and downright selfish individuals. When a child is told that he should perform better than his classmates or his cousins he assumes that this is the way one should live (all his life). He then develops a feeling that proving oneself better than others is the only way to attract attention, the only way to succeed and become an achiever and to live life. Such children go up to be overly ambitious individuals who have only one way to measure success and that is by counting the number of promotions that have got in their job or by the amount of money they have made in their business. They might become materially successful but will lead a life full of anxiety and stress. And what is success if one's peace is eroded by constant mental agony and stress? The education system and media is no less to blame than parents for making people competitive. Our rotten education system labels children on the basis of marks and ranks. So right from childhood, children get accustomed to being slotted and labeled. The child who secures a higher rank is a "good boy" while the one with the lowest rank is a "bad boy" irrespective of what other great talents he might be possessing. This ranking system obviously sows the seeds of competitiveness in children. Rarely is any child upon reaching adulthood becomes fortunate enough to be spiritually mature to see through this illusion of superior and inferior.

If I were to pinpoint the single most important cause of a person being competitive, it would be lack of courage to face others. A competitive person suffers from some deep seated inferiority complex and insecurity and hence is always trying to live up to the expectations of others even at the cost of his own happiness. He thinks that by not being number one or by not being successful to the extent others expect him to be, he will not be of any worth. Nothing could be further from truth.